If there is one thing that occupies almost everyone’s mind it is the dream of happiness. Doing what ever needs to be done to attain an even higher sense of enjoyment, meaning or personal success. But is that really happiness?
A Journey to Far Away Lands
About thirty-five years ago I did an extended tour of Bangladesh, Thailand and Nepal visiting many Missions and Aid Agencies. This was long before the internet or mobile phones and we travelled to some very beautiful remote locations. Even so, if there was one thing that stood out to me was that despite simple lifestyle and very limited income of the people, most of them were genuinely happy. In fact, I came home feeling very blessed that I had met what appeared to be some of the happiest people on the planet.
This seems to be something few understand these days. To really gauge when a Client will arrive at being happy, I ask them the following question…
“I will be happy when…’
"When this happens, then I will be happy."
Some might answer, “When I am successful in my career.” Or “when a am earning $xxx of money. Or even “When I find the right relationship partner.”
From a weight loss perspective, someone might answer, “When I weigh xkg.” Or “When I can fit into this dress.” Or even, “When I feel attractive enough.”
All of these things are external desires and goals aiming for the future ‘thing’. It is conditional on the external thing being met. If it is not achieved, then you won’t be happy. That’s hard!
Is this truly the road to happiness? I believe it isn’t. There is a certain amount of satisfaction obtained by achieving these things but limited happiness is obtained because now a new goal is needed.
True and lasting Happiness
I believe true happiness is an internal thing and doesn’t need any help from the external world. It’s how you feel about yourself as a person regardless what anyone else thinks or what you achieve. It’s enjoying waking up with you, caring for and nurturing you, growing and becoming even more amazing and acknowledging the beautiful person you are. It accepts all your achievements and your imperfections. It doesn’t need anyone else’s opinion or any external thing to be achieved.
I saw these qualities in the many of village people I met all those years ago.
When this is applied to Mind-Body Eating principles, dieting and eating challenges, even exercise, takes on a new meaning.
Take some ‘time out’ for you today - just for you. Sit with yourself for a few minutes and acknowledge yourself for being you and being awesome, regardless of what is going on in your life.
**** Enroll for March ******
Enjoying Eating, Enjoying You!
This 12 week online Group Coaching program takes a welcome and holistic approach to overcoming chronic dieting and eating challenges. Eating will never be the same again!
Email for details or visit www.thehumanexperiencecoach.com.au
Barry McElhinney is Founder and Human Behavioural Coach at
The Human Experience Coach.
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